“During a Separation from an Abusive situation abusive Religion, or following a divorce, it is so important to start the process of freeing your mind from toxic, negative and unhealthy thoughts. This journey may be painful at first, but there are so many benefits: less energy spent on painful memories, reduced stress, better sleeps, more mental-space for newfound peace and joys that are on the horizon. Even with the benefits, freeing your mind can feel overwhelming and impossible, for some.
Consider this list of 10 ways to free your mind from negativity:
1. Declutter your space: As soon as you start to declutter your space, you free your mind from mental attachments to objects that may remind you of your past Religious experience. Re-evaluate all items in your space. Does it serve a purpose? Your Bible collection may be pleasant for you, but throw out your religious books! Does it help you continue on your journey to heal? Throw things out! This first step will automatically make some space in your mind for new happy thoughts. Out of sight, out of mind.
2. Therapy: Get a massage. Everyone should go to therapy! Especially those who are leaving a very high control religion. The governing body of Jehovah witnesses controls every aspect of members lives. Therapy is simply a set-time where you get to talk all about you! How often does that really happen? It can be daunting at first; however, it can soon become a safe-space. When you communicate negative thoughts and painful memories to someone, it becomes easier to let those thoughts and memories go. Therapists can also suggest some wonderful strategies to help you let go of, and move past, unhealthy thinking. Find a therapist in your area. We will also talk with you via Skype or by phone in on the conference line. Let us know when you will be available and someone will come on at that time to talk. (302)202-1117 x979945.
3. Imagine your beautiful future: You have been through some unbelievably hard times. You have had your whole life controlled. Now perhaps you are being shunned by family or people that you felt were your friends, time does heal, and you never know what may be just around the corner. Start imagining that beautiful future you want for yourself. Think about that goal that you want to work toward. Focus on the positive trajectory you want your life to take. You have been told you have to rush and do this or that because God is going to kill you at Armageddon. You have terrorized, scared to death by men.
4. Mindfulness Practices: mindfulness is so important during this process. Take up a yoga class, meditate, give gratitude, be thankful, live in the moment, let yesterday go, be present, and breathe. Go for some power walks and notice your surroundings, birds, little creatures, people, trees and buildings. Enjoy breathing look up to the sky and be thankful that you are free!
5. Change your expectations: A lot of our pain and unhealthy thinking comes from our expectations of ourselves, our partners, and our lives and what we expected from a religion. These expectations could have been created by upbringing, society, culture, family or friends. Re-evaluate all of your expectations. Are they realistic? Do they add value to your life? Can you change them so that you don’t feel hurt or disappointed by the expectations you hold? Why haven’t you had confidence in yourself and the ability to go straight to God thru Jesus Christ?
6. Take a break from social media: Friends on Facebook, Instagram, twitter, and other social media platforms often show off the very best aspects of their lives. Realize that this is not their every-day reality. Take a break from social media and live for only you. Be thankful for all that you do have and acknowledge all the things in your life that bring you happiness already. But if you don’t have friends facebook does has pages now where you can talk about problems. So you make the call. You are in control of this now.
7. Set a time-limit on negative thoughts: Even though you may be trying your hardest to never think your negative thoughts, maybe you can’t banish them completely. Do yourself a favor and set a time-limit on how long you allow yourself to think about these things. It may be as small as 2 minutes; or maybe you need a larger window, like 15 minutes. Set a timer every day and think exclusively about these things for the time amount you choose. Then, do not allow yourself to think about them again until tomorrow. You may find that eventually, you do not need this at all, as the thoughts aren’t there anymore. People said ugly things to you for leaving the religion or perhaps you were disfellowshipped. Only think about that horrible meeting with the elders for a limited time until you realize those men don’t mean anything in your life only among the few little witnesses in their little circle. Say cult.
8. Journal: The simple act of getting out those painful thoughts and feelings can help you let it all go. A journal is a great tool for this. It could be the traditional paper and pen format. Maybe you want to keep your journal digitally. Whatever works for you. Get those negative thoughts out and let them go. You may blog here with a friend or friends.
9. Reconnect with friends and family: While going through transition to freedom, it’s possible that you alienated yourself from some of your friends and family. This is 100% normal. Now is the time to reconnect with these people and re-establish healthy relationships with people who love you and want the best for you.” Some will welcome you freely others may wonder why, how could you separate yourself from your family all those years. Explain you were sucked into a cult situation or born into it. Be humble and ask them to forgive you. Reach for their hand. Hug them. There is power and healing in touch. Don’t be afraid to cry and let them come in. This will be your posse like Jesus and his 12.
10. Go to You Tube and listen to some of the other people give their thoughts on Bible knowledge. They don’t have to be prophecy, just some little facts. For instance, what Hebrew and Greek words mean and look at historical stuff. Manna Fest on You Tube has a lot of historical info. Go see a movie, plant a garden. One former CO took up guitat lessons and got a job cleaning an office once a week for some seed money. I do massage therapy Life coaching speaking engagements for a little extra cash. I go see my family and grandbabies a lot. I put doll houses together for a hobby.
We meet here to discuss scriptures only every Thursday on the Conference call in line and it is uplifting the stuff we learn from just the Bible as the Holy Spirit steps in sit awhile. Love you so much.
Thanks for listening. This is your site talk, to each other freely. You can question long held doctrines of any religion, freely.
Letting go of negative thoughts is giving more room for Holy Spirit to help you to understand scriptures. Prayers are needed too.
For me I have found a way how to understand scriptures better. Learn books, chapters and verses slowly by thinking what this writer was talking about. Fisrst I read a verse. Then I write a headline to paper from words of that verse. Then I read the chapter again to get more headlines and place verses under them. So I get the whole picture of the word of that book.
Blessings for you all in Christ
Marjo that is excellent info, thanbks for sharing. I too feel we have to know who they are talking too first and what situation they might have been dealing with. Often we always read a scripture and now my mind sees it had nothing to do with what it was used for.
We have to “trust the Spirit” and “prove all things” for ourselves.
We have to retrain our brains by working hard to see through the eyes of God’s spirit because our doctrines were mostly made up by men with an agenda.
I am so glad to see you holding on to the word and study although you are being hit.
You give me courage as I perceive persons making it difficult for me to forget the hate and pain and now just push forward!
I am going to follow your example and others to just keep on praying and doing what the Holy Spirit leads me to do. It can be discouraging sometimes.
I really look forward to tonight as we have fun hearing each other’s voice and it is a place among friends.
Greg,
I was just going over everything that happened yesterday and today. It has been a roller coaster for me. I have found out more than I ever wanted or cared to know about religious organizations, their make up and their leaders.
I am drawing a conclusion that I will go to Jesus Christ and forget any form of organized religion.
Some religions are Hierarchies with a heavy top, composed of governing bodies and sub bodies of elders, Circuit overseers, bishops and on and on.
Others are cloak in a veneer of not being an organization of hierarchy but a lateral equal body that acts just the same and have the same effect.
You mentioned that I was stuck, I think that is an accurate description of where I am now. I have been trying to mind my own business and help others, take care of myself and study the Bible to my hearts content. I love Manna Fest on You Tube because he has so much history about places mentioned in the Bible and a wealth of knowledge on understanding of the Bible.
I thought I finally had control over my life but I feel I have been used and lost more years of my life getting sucked into philosophy of men. It was for the most part a pleasant and quiet journey. Now, I am moving on with confidence (got to have this faith) that God is training us all and getting rid of the dreg and impurities. Christians are fighting against an invisible force when you try to stick to just God and not follow men. As has been the story of my life (no matter how I back down and out) people come after me. Thanks to my journey, I am stronger now and will just keep on pushing. I don’t know what I , we , would do without each other in our little group. I pray God will bless us as we study the Bible without long held religious views popping up.
From last night through today there has been FIRE! I am going to bed, I need some rest. Take Care
October 12, 2018 at 12:36 pm
I have personally used almost every one of these suggestions— Not as thought they were hard and fast rules, but as ideas, as toys to play with in the great sandbox of life. Once I PLAY with the idea, I can experiment with it, tweak it, tailor it to fit me better, and then soon I find that I’m taking better care of myself. So I suggest that maybe the underlying principle in all of these ideas is to learn to LISTEN INSIDE YOURSELF. Learn to listen to what your body, your stomach, your heart, your breathing, your muscles, your reactions, and your entire being is doing and saying to you.
And remember, often times, REAL learning comes from doing–not from being told what to do. Give it some time and try to notice all that’s really happening as you try these ideas out. Who knows? Maybe you’ll discover something new and useful that you can then share with us and others.
-greg